Getting Caught Cheating on Social Media.

This is probably the most important article I have ever written for two reasons. First, it is a way to make right some of the pain I have caused my wife, and second to keep someone else from making this horrible mistake. About a year ago I began investing my time into building an online presence. I wanted to see if I could make money by creating a web sight and building  a following on different social media sites. I even began this blog as a way to communicate ideas and pass on information for people of my age group who have a like minded approach to life. What happened was never wanted or planned for.

When I began to connect online with people on Face-book, Instagram, and especially Twitter, some of these people were helpful and supportive, but there was a darker side of social media that I became involved with that I didn’t plan on and never saw coming. I became involved in several inappropriate online relationships that I now realize were toxic to me and extremely destructive to my marriage. I began to resent the people close to me and to turn instead  to those online presences were I could get constant validation  and adoration. I began to build a following of people, especially women, who would always praise and admire me, and  I could block anyone  I felt wasn’t contributing  to my daily dose of flattery. It was like a drug, having my ego stroked on an almost daily basis. I gave and received approval and acceptance of my stupidity and hubris. I can see why people become addicted to social media and why society puts so much time and effort into it. But beware-the social networks are not reality. Reality is most likely sitting next to you being ignored while you spend hours on Face-book and Twitter. I ignored and lied to my wife for months while flirting and having inappropriate relationshops with other women. I even went so far as to publicly post hateful and untrue things about my wife to complete strangers to garner sympathy and attention. For this I am truly sorry.  I was addicted to social media and I was willing to ignore and hurt my family to garner attention from celebrities and strangers.

Was this reality?  Of course not! Those people’s beliefs and likes or dislikes have absolutely nothing to do with whether or not someone’s personal relationships are healthy. In fact, I would venture to say that our fascination with the trivial and mundane actions and opinions of the social elite, or any perfect stranger, is counter-productive to a healthy psychological existence.

There is another side of social media that I would like to address. There are people that treat the internet as their personal playground for having on-line affairs, and it is all too easy to become involved in this type of behavior. It can begin with an innocent comment or joke and quickly denigrate into what can only be described as emotional cheating. Even if you don’t ever act upon it, the fact that you are willing to go to someone other than your spouse for comfort, support and affection is cheating. I was guilty of this behavior, and I am extremely lucky to have a wife that has forgiven my online indiscretions and lack of good judgement, and given me a second chance. Realize that anything you put on the internet has the ability to affect the lives of so many around you, including people you will never meet. The pain it can cause can be immense and irreversible.

There is an old story of a mother who brings her son to a priest because he continues to use foul language and say mean things to others, and she doesn’t know what to do. The Priest thinks for a moment, goes to retrieve a feather pillow, and gives it to the boy. He then instructs the boy to go outside, rip open the pillow and throw the feathers to the wind. When the boy has finished, he goes back into the church, to the Priest and his Mother. The Priest then asks the boy if he has done as he asked, to which he replies “yes!” with a big grin. The Priest then instructs the boy to go retrieve the feathers and put them back into the pillow. The smile quickly leaves the child’s face and is replaced by a look of fear. The Priest asks what is the matter, to which the boy replies “That’s impossible! The feathers are everywhere, scattered in the wind!” The Priest smiles and says “Exactly, Just like words”. The Priest goes on to explain that words are just like feathers, once released into the wind they can never be retrieved. So be careful with the words you release upon the world, they can never be retrieved, and their damage can likely never be undone.

I was reminded of this story when I watched the anguish and pain on the face of someone I love very much ( My Wife) as she read some of the things I had posted on social media. I can never take those things back, all I can do is apologize for my actions and ask  forgiveness…although  I don’t think that most of the people who are self proclaimed kings and queens of social media will ever feel the need to do that. But you know what- I’ll never know. You see, I have deleted all of my social media accounts and began a new life where I spend my free time with the loved ones who mean everything to me, and very little time (meaning none) paying attention to social media.

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Core Training and Martial Arts

I have been training in Martial Arts for about five years in Uechi Ryu or Pang Gai Noon. This is not considered a popular style in the United States probably for the fact that it is a traditional style that requires body conditioning that probably looks a little insane to the average person. Uechi Ryu  requires receiving body shots (lets face it,in a fight nobody gets away without taking a hit) and then moving into attacks. For this reason a type of Iron Shirt Kung Fu, or Iron Body, Depending on your history, is practiced. This practice means that there is a lot of focus on core strength. This focus is essential in the ability to refocus the attack back to the attacker. (See Qi Gong)

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The reason I’m writing this is My beautiful wife has lost her mind and decided to start training in Uechi Ryu also. Before she begins her training next week, she asked me about a month ago if there was anything she could do to get ready for training and the only thing I said was core strength and diet. So she began a light training regimen of crunches and leg lifts to help build her core muscles and a diet high in vegetables and a small amount of meat protein to build muscle and lose fat around her abdomen. Immediately she saw results in weight loss and core strength. Two weeks into the program she had lost 15 Lbs. and had increased her core workout to include a variety of exercises that included her arms, shoulders and legs. Over the last several weeks I introduced her to the heavy bag hanging in the garage.

heavy bag 2.JPGShe took to it like a fish to water and enjoyed hitting the bag with a combination of kicks and punches. The work out on the bag is intense and although it only lasts for fifteen minutes it will leave you drenched in sweat. Over the next few weeks she combined her core exercises  with the bag work and lost an additional 10 lbs, hit her goal weight, and you can now see her abs.

I know the bi weekly work outs will be tough but when I started I didn’t prepare and the first six months were an ass kicking experience. Hopefully the preparation my wife has done will make it easier for her in the beginning. If you are considering a new exercise regimen make sure you set realistic goals-nothing will  keep you from moving forward faster than setting unrealistic goals. Remember, it will take time. Patience and focus will carry you through the times when you feel like you aren’t making progress. Trust me, when you start to see a difference in the way your clothes fit, it will help drive you forward. Treat yourself to a gift when you reach your goals. I find new clothes are a great gift-enjoy your new self and keep your passion alive.  And remember, all the exercise will not do anything for you if you don’t change your diet. Diet is 80% of the equation! Please read my articles on proper diet.

 

Foot Care

I don’t know about you, but I refuse to be one of those old men wearing black socks and sandals

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I don’t know when this became a thing, but this is a fashion I will never accept. Summer is coming and lets face it as men we rarely think about foot care. Your feet say something about who you are. Now, I’m not saying go get a pedicure, but lets clean them up and show them off. Having well groomed feet in sandals is something you should never be ashamed of. With a little care and “Trimming” you can escape from this horrible look. You wouldn’t walk around with a bad hair cut, or wear a shirt with food stains all over it so why are we so willing to do this to our feet.

Most of use don’t even have to look any further than our wives or girlfriends for the tools we need. But, if they are not willing to share, or you are embarrassed to ask, you can purchase a kit for about twenty dollars. Beware your kit will be ransacked by your female partner in a heart beat so make sure and hide it well.

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men’s tool kit for feet and nails

I take good care of my feet because I do martial arts and I keep my toenails well groomed so that I don’t injure someone unintentionally. I also have callouses on my feet that protect them while doing martial arts that will shred bed sheets so I have to wear sport socks at night so that my wife won’t kill me in my sleep. If you have calluses you might consider using a callus removal tool. Just be careful and go easy, you don’t want to remove to much the first time out, the result can be painful. Ask for help you might be shocked at how long your partner has been waiting to do this for you.

I could post pictures of ugly feet, but I just ate breakfast and I’d like to keep it down. I will post a picture of healthy feet, that are well groomed.

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Imagine having feet that you can show off this summer. You will also notice that your feet will feel better at the end of the day. I work on my feet, sometimes twelve hours straight and having well groomed feet makes a difference at the end of the day. You wouldn’t buy cheap shoes to go with a suit, so when enjoying a day at the beach or park with your family why would you wear ugly feet. Believe me this will make a difference in how you view yourself. Everything you do to improve your self view will improve your journey to better health and quality of life. Your significant other will appreciate the effort too, showing that you care how you look will make a difference in how others perceive you. One of the most attractive qualities in a man, according to women, is self confidence, so be confident in every aspect of yourself.

Skin Care For Men Over Fifty.

I would like to address some thing most men ignore. You are watching your diet, exercising, but you, like most of use, have totally ignored your skin health. Your skin is not only the largest organ on your body, but it will tell you what you are doing wrong. If you are not drinking enough water, your skin will look dry. If you are lacking certain vitamins in your diet, your skin will tell you. If you are ignoring your skin you are ignoring your health. I know we have all been told that you shouldn’t go out in the sun without sun block, (didn’t hear that when we were kids). This will help to keep any further damage from occurring, and don’t just pick any one, go for max protection. A daily regimen is important also. I have been testing several products over the last three months and can make some recommendations.

If you are exercising then you are showering more than the normal person (I hope) and most of us think, “We are men we use soap!” well yes we do but you don’t have to use any soap. Nivea makes a range of products for men that are not that much more expensive than plain old soap. Nivea Men Pure Impact 3-1 body wash is great.

download (1) I have tried a couple of different body wash products but this is great. Nice fresh scent without any heavy perfumes, and it leaves your skin clean without feeling oily. Nivea Men original Moisturizing Face Wash is my favorite product

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Every morning and every night before bed I use this to wash my face it leaves my face feeling clean without feeling tight, I follow this up with Nivea Men protective lotion to keep my skin protected from excessive drying and damage throughout the day. There are other products out there but from the ones I’ve tried these have given me amazing results. My skin has become much younger looking and the wrinkles around my eyes and ears and the sun spots on my cheeks were beginning to fade. Try a few things see what works best for you, these are only recommendations. Remember the most important thing you can do for your skin is drink water followed by a well balanced diet. The more vegetables you add into your diet the more your skin will improve. If you are losing a lot of weight keeping your skin as supple as possible will help to keep the skin sag to a minimum. No one wants to look like a Turkey Necked Basset Hound. Remember there are no quick fixes anything that is worth while will take effort, commitment, and time.

The Human Touch

Since the time of birth, we as a species crave human contact. There have been extensive studies done with primates that prove the need for physical contact.Without contact these primates exhibit anti social behavior. Symptoms of anxiety, were reclusive and exhibited social deficits. The primates that were raised with a mother but no playmates exhibited fear and aggressive behavior. (See Dr. Harry Harlow Rhesus Macaques.)

These studies have been the cornerstone for psychological development studies in children raised in situations were their early development and lack of attachment have been a direct source of aggressive, anti social and in some cases violent behavior. You can disagree with the analysis of these scientists but I am going to carry it a step further. I believe this carries on into every age in growth and development.

Have any of you ever met someone that exclaims “I don’t like to be touched” I know I have met several people that have made this statement. and I have noticed they have the same character traits as the subjects in these studies. Almost to the person they claim to be loners because they like it that way. Or they don’t have any personal relationships because they “Can’t relate to people”, or they “don’t work well with others”. This type of behavior is in my opinion anti social and can be dangerous.  The last person I met that made these types of claims attacked his room mate with a hatchet and shot himself in the head. He was 27. I also believe that boys raised in a home with a strong matriarch and no strong positive male role models have a predisposition towards misogynistic tendencies. I remember talking to the Rev. Cecil Murray who at the time was the leader of the First A.M.E. Church in Los Angeles just before to the Riots in L.A. and he hypothesized that the downfall for young black youth in America was the lack of interaction with positive role models for  young men in the African American community. murray217

At the time I believed he was on to something and I still do, but I think there is another part of the equation. I believe that a nurturing home can break this cycle of distrust and violence. I know, the old “Nature verses Nurture argument”, and yes there are people that are just born with a chemical and developmental deficiency in the brain that will cause violence and negative behavior. But that is another argument for another time.

I am going to put forth the hypothesis that continued separation from loving human contact into adulthood can cause even more issues. Failed relationships, depression, addiction, and violence. As a parent this is a concern, as it should be , that my child not fall into this downward spiral, and take out his anger on society. It has become almost a punchline about the twenty something that lives in his parents basement with no friends and trolls the internet all day and night. Or the comic book aficionado that pours over his books all day and night and only converses with others on subjects like Batman vs Superman. The ability of these people to become reclusive and given access to huge volumes of information and like minded people has given rise to a new type of social outcast with violent tendencies.

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Now lets throw access to deadly weapons into the equation and you have a recipe for a deadly killer who doesn’t consider other people as important or even human in some cases. You can see where this is going. Can you imagine what happens when these armed sociopaths are let loose on society. most of us don’t have to, we have all seen it play out on the news over and over. The only thing that I can come up with that is even a viable solution, is to put yourself out there and make a difference when you can. We cannot afford to sit on the side lines and watch the slaughter of the innocent. Right now it seems to affect males more than females, but those lines are starting to blur, and I’m beginning to see young women showing these same signs as the gender barriers are becoming less and less. You can’t expect the Government to help. They have proven that, with their funding cuts in mental health care. The schools don’t have the necessary funding to address this serious issue, even though they are the unfortunate battle ground for most of this violence. It will fall on each and every one of us to make the difference.

‘What can I do?” well, that’s a lot  easier than you think. If you know someone that is suffering, show them kindness, let them know you are there for them, “No Matter What”. pull them out of their shell. It is hard work but well worth it. If you can show one person that suffers that they are not alone and that they matter you could save lives. It will take patience and compassion to make a difference, but this has to happen. I can no longer sit on the sidelines and watch this tragedy play out and I am challenging any one who reads this to try and make a difference. All it takes is a “Human Touch”

For You Kelly, I wish now, I had done more.

It Works If You Work It.

This is going to be short and sweet. My name is Don and I’m an alcoholic. Back when I first got sober those words held so much power over me. I was a mess, my life was in upheaval and I was 42 years old. I started thinking recently why I started drinking in the first place. Self esteem seems to be the number one reason I started drinking. You see I had no self esteem for many reasons. Alcohol allowed me to open up and release the person inside I wanted to be. having spent the last ten years going to meetings and listening to others, I realized that this is the reason most people start drinking. They don’t like who they are and alcohol allows them to be someone else. That is of course until it stops working and they become that drunken mess we all know and love. Now some of you might be wondering why I would write about this on a blog about turning fifty. Well there are some of us, Even at fifty that struggle with substance abuse. Just know this ” It’s never to late to say no more”, to spend more time with the ones you love with out the drinking. You will find you will argue less and smile more. Remember this they love you as an alcoholic, or addict, and they will love you even more as a better version of you. This isn’t about change, this is about being a better version of the person you already are.

I know there are some of you saying ” I only have a glass of wine when I get home from work” my question is Why? there are better ways to decompress. and have you ever felt irritated when you don’t get a glass of wine. Or thought ” Man, I could really use a drink.” these are all excuses to drink. I’m not trying to get people to stop, My issues are not your issues. I’m just asking that every once in a while instead of the drink spend some time hugging your family. You will get the same good feeling as the glass of wine and your body will thank you. Your family might think you lost your mind but you will feel so much better afterwards it will be worth it. If Anyone would like to get sober please contact me through this blog and I would be honored to take the time to be of service to you and get you in touch with the people that can change your life. Hugs to all that struggle, and all my love to those that struggle with them.

Music is my Panacea

I can’t think of a time or moment in my life that music wasn’t attached. Music brings back feelings and memories faster than anything else for me. I can’t think of a moment or person in my life that doesn’t have a song attached to them. My lifetime play list has a mixture of everything in it. Every artist from Puccini and Mozart to Bowie and even Herb Albert. I would hazard a guess that there is a song you associate with a certain person or event in your life. Music as a artistic medium is powerful and universal. There isn’t a culture in the world that doesn’t have music as a cornerstone of that culture. We use music to celebrate, to lament, to pass time, to show allegiance, and to mark emotional triumph. I.E. the song We shall overcome, Immediately we think of Martin Luther King and the struggle for equality. I find myself turning to music more and more to express my feelings and remember happy and sad times in my life. The other day some one sent me a music video on Facebook that was about loss of youth and regret. I immediately felt their   pain without having to be there to experience it. Having known this person for a really long time, I sent back a video of REO Speedwagon’s “Take It on the Run” which was the song playing in her Carmen Ghia on my Prom night. A really happy memory for me, and hopefully for her. I don’t know if she got the reference but every time I hear any song from “High Infidelity” I think of her.

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I had a cat pass away a few years back. She was an ugly little cat and only was sweet to me, and she hated my wife. (long Story). She became ill and I held her while the vet gave her the shot. On the way home I turned on the radio and Hall and Oates “She’s Gone” came on and I had to pull over and began to cry. To this day I can’t hear that song without tearing up. (Stupid Song)…. Anyway I’m sure there are songs that touch each one of you in some way or other.1035x819-halloates-1800-1386947504

This begs the question then… Why would the school district put so much into sports in the school system, but so little funding on the arts and music programs. shouldn’t it be the other way around. Shouldn’t we be teaching our kids about healthy and creative expression of their feelings and not putting so much emphasis on potentially harmful sports. And while I’m on the subject, Why aren’t we teaching Martial Arts and Meditation in the schools. Kids that have tools to calm their brains and protect themselves, what a concept. To radical? maybe but these are the standards in Asian countries and they don’t have kids running down school halls with automatic weapons. OK that got dark quick.

The main reason for this disproportionate use of funds is money. Schools make money off of sports. that is it. It has to be, otherwise they wouldn’t spend so much on these programs. If anyone else has an answer for this I would love to hear it. I would bet that if you asked any artist why they started in music they would say school. These are the people that are sowing the tapestry of our lives,(except Kanye, I cant imagine anyone wanting him to speak for them) When have anyone said Time Tebow reminds me of the day my son was born. Or John Elway makes me think of my first love, Eww.

Sunday from the Heart

What is love? I treat Valentines day just like I do any made up holiday designed to increase gift card and candy sales. I dismiss it and go a different direction. I find myself being introspective and self deprecating. Why should I take one day a year and tell the people I love, that I love them? And why didn’t I let them know the rest of the year that I love them? If I have to put all my love into one day, then I would have to describe myself as a selfish asshole. Some would say ” Valentines day is about romance”. What is so romantic about a stuffed bear a pseudo heart shaped card and a box of chocolates and flowers. I can’t imagine the look on my face if someone gave me this array of crap. I can’t think of anything more superficial and trite. I propose that we make Valentine’s day the rule, not the exception. “I pledge to tell the ones I love, that I love them, everyday.” and furthermore “I swear I will never hand you a card, bear, box of chocolates, or a bunch of flowers to tell you how I feel”. I plan to give love to all and take extra care to let those closest to me know that I love them everyday. Except on valentines day!

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Self Realization and Fulfillment

I have found in my life that many times I have changed paths of attaining happiness. Some paths were spiritual, Some were physical, and some were mental. The problem I had in my youth was the fact that I listened to the people that had different views of what was important to them. This however was not what was important to me. The “Question” then becomes what is important to you? Well…. I thought, when I was younger, that career was important, but that can be confusing when you don’t know what you want to be when you grow up. (not sure I’m there yet) I spent my youth going from One job to another, and college was a waste of time for the most part. Colleges need to streamline their curriculum to only include the courses you need to get your degree and quit adding bullshit courses that have nothing to do with your area of learning. Its just a waste of time and money.

As I got older money , I was told was the most important thing, and the ability to acquire money was the path to happiness. In my search for the almighty dollar I meet a lot of like minded people and came to the realization that I wasn’t happy and I was constantly stressed and the people I met weren’t happy either. As I got older most of these people are now trading in their wealth to try to regain their health and happiness. Seems a little backward to me, trading your youth and health for money that you will then use to pay to try to heal all the medical problems you got from the stress and long hours you had to give to attain your money. Does anyone else see the problem with this, or is it just me? On a side note I always found this study interesting. This is a chart of diminishing return for money spent vs. happiness

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As I got older and got married, started a family, I realized I was spending less and less time with my family and more and more time at work. This was not the family model I wanted for myself or them. Growing up in a family were my father worked a lot and was gone for days at a time I remembered what that was like. I would have gladly given up all the nice things we had for a better relationship with my father. With both parents working it becomes even harder for a child to have a healthy relationship as they grow when all they see growing up is two parents chasing their careers and fighting over money when they were home at the same time. I didn’t want that as my son got older than four so my wife and I talked about it and came to the conclusion that we would choose happiness over wealth.

Now that being said I am not suggesting anyone live in poverty, no what I’m suggesting is scale back your life style, cut out the extras that don’t mean anything to you. Spend more time with the ones you love and build strong positive relationships with the ones you love. By doing this we discovered that we could cut back our hours at work by almost half. This is huge! My wife was able to cut back to only 20 hrs a week from forty plus and I could cut back to forty five hours a week from my usual seventy two hrs a week. We still had more than enough money to pay the bills and money for retirement and vacations. Our marriage was stronger and we had more time to spend with our son.

Now I want to touch on the spiritual side of my journey. I was raised an Irish Catholic and consider myself recovering Catholic now. I realized at a very young age that there might be more than one answer when it came to spiritual happiness. So I embarked on a journey of self discovery of spiritual realization. And yes I dabbled in mind altering psychedelics in the seventies. I lived in the Haight- Ashbury district in San Francisco for a while I dabbled in other religions and beliefs, and ended my journey realizing that everything I needed was within me. I settled on Buddhism as a belief system because through the years I saw that life gives you back what you put into it. I wanted to have a happy, positive existence so I figured I had to put happy, positive thoughts and actions into my life. Buddhism seems to be the closest thing to this belief system. So when someone asks I simply say Buddhist and wait for the look of disbelief on their face. I’m not going to get all warm and fuzzy here I just wanted to explain my position.

My physical journey began when I started buying slip on shoes so I didn’t have to bend over to tie my shoes. Some times something so small can be the trigger you need to make a life changing decision. I made the decision to try to reverse the damage I had done trying to attain some imaginary dollar amount before it became a medical issue. I embarked upon a journey of physical health through proper diet and exercise. I also found a sort of spiritual peace through this fitness program centered around Martial Arts.

Now, lets pull all this together into something that makes sense. Three things had to happen for this to work.

  1. Focus on whats really important to you. Family, relationships, etc.
  2. find a spiritual belief system that works for you.
  3. Make a commitment to take care of yourself through a proper diet and exercise.

You will find if you can pull these things together you will have a life filled with love and possibility. You will also have time to pursue your passions what ever they may be. You stress levels will go way down, you wont try to control every aspect of your life and the lives of the people around you. Also you will have time to give to others that need your help because for what ever reason their life is out of balance. There is no greater joy in life than being of service to others. So live your life with purpose and joy and it will positively affect everyone around you.

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Happiness and Letting Go

I will never forget the day I finally saw the path to happiness. It wasn’t through medication, it wasn’t through a life changing experience,or Religion. The day I saw the path to happiness I was in a pretty low place, feeling sorry for myself and trying to figure out what I was going to do next. When something I had been listening to hit me like a bolt of lightning. You are not in control of your life! Anyone that has ever been in a twelve step program has heard this at every meeting, but, what does it really mean, what are the implications and what are the ramifications.

The moment I realized I was trying to control my life and the people around me, I also realized what a mess I had made of everything and how I had negatively affected the people around me, especially the ones closest to me. I knew what a practice in futility I had been involved in, and I had to put a stop to it as quickly as possible. This was only the first step of many towards happiness but I’ll get to those shortly.The realization of what a narcissistic individual I had become also allowed me to see a direct correlation between my behavior and my unhappy existence.

Step one: Letting Go! Stop, take a deep breath and release, like tentacles from a giant squid feel everything in your life trying to hold on, but you have to release all of it. The pain, the sorrow, the anxiety, all of it has to go. Like taking out the trash you can’t hold on to the garbage that’s been weighing you down all these years. Remember holding on to the things that you feel are important will leave you angry, frustrated, stressed and unable to make any kind of meaningful contribution to your life or any ones life that you care about.

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Step Two: Take the first step, keeping a positive attitude, now that you aren’t holding on to all the baggage that was weighing you down, You have the potential to do so much with your free time. look for positive things that will keep your brain producing happy juice. Little things at first will help keep you in a happy mood. do things that interest you, even taking a walk and paying attention to the world around you, you will find happiness in nature.

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  I see young children already being closed off and self involved, if they don’t realize that they are not the center of the universe, they will become unhappy teenagers, disenfranchised young adults and disillusioned thirty somethings heading for an adult life full of regret and turmoil, creating their own nightmare of trying to find happiness through others or worse self medicating to the point of death. A pretty bleak future, Don’t you agree. The good news is it doesn’t have to be that way.

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Step Three: Being of Service. There is no greater joy in life than being of service to someone else. This does not mean that you should go out and join the Peace Corps, but helping someone in need each day will go a long way. Think of it as recharging your battery. Every time your battery gets low you get depressed, Helping someone in need recharges your battery. But remember the charge is only temporary, just like any battery in a cell phone your happiness needs constant attention and up keep.

You have probably noticed the quotes from the Dalai Lama, well, after my epiphany I went in search for people who had the same realization that I did without the whole God belief system and the need to worship imaginary friends. The search made me realize that there was probably good parts to any belief system. So then I started looking for commonalities in these belief systems and “Low and Behold” one belief system was based on self-awareness and direct correlation between personal happiness and reducing pain in others. in case you haven’t guessed it was Buddhism. But if you’re not comfortable with that there also Yodaism.

Stress is the killer of health and dreams so de-stress when ever possible. Remember You Are Not In Control. Stress causes so many problems that can be avoided by just letting go. You will find you will sleep better, eat better, your Immune system will be better, and you will enjoy life with a smile on your face.

Be careful what you focus on moving forward. We are the only known species that will relentlessly chase an intangible in the pursuit of happiness only to discover that the only true happiness can be achieved by pursuing balance within. People  get fixated on money in the first half of their life-giving up their health, only to spend the second half spending all the money to recover the health they lost. Use the time you have left working towards a healthy and happy future pursuing your passions what ever they may be.